
Written by KarenWe're all familiar with those classic self-taken and group photos that girls love to post on Facebook. We've all seen them, taken them, spent embarrassing amounts of time in front of PhotoBooth perfecting an adorable "kissy" face photo for our profile pictures. Now guys enjoy participating in self-taken pictures as well, but there's no mistaking that girls are the primary perpetrators. After all, the affectionate label for any individual who enjoys taking and posing for hundreds, even thousands of these photos is "camera whore."
So here's a guide to some of the basic Facebook photo poses we've all come to recognize and how best to maximize their effect...
The Kissy-Face: Girl or group of girls will all face the camera and pucker up. The kissy-face is one of the most basic poses that is often used in conjunction with a variety of other poses, so it's important for every girl to come equipped with a well-rehearsed kissy-face. This can be achieved after spending hours in front of the mirror figuring out how to make the upper-lip look as luscious and Angelina-Jolie-esque as possible. While the kissy-face is effective open-eyed, a closed-eye kissy-face is typically much more seductive.
The Playful, Stick-out-your-tongue (SOYT) Face: Demonstrates your care-free playfulness by gaping your mouth and sticking out your tongue. The SOYT can exude child-like innocence, femme-fatale danger, or drunken sloppiness. Just keep in mind that the ultimate point is to demonstrate how good at blowjobs you are.
The I LOVE ALCOHOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!: Variations on the kissy-face and SOYT face, only with alcoholic beverages or paraphernalia as the object of attention. These photos usefully communicate the likelihood that you'll make out with random guys at the bar with the help of your trusty beer goggles.
The Sorority Squat: Classic sorority pose where the girls line up in two rows and the first row of girls squat down at approximately 145 degrees, simulating doggy-style sex. Arms are usually placed on your knees to accentuate cleavage.
The Growler Face: This is a good pose to resort to when you're unprepared (somebody throws a camera at your face unexpectedly, or they're using a flash in a dark room). Simply make a growling, cutely-angry face by bearing a little bit of teeth and, if you want to embellish a little bit, simulate "claws" with your hands. This pose sends the message that you can be a tiger in the sack and are up for a little rough lovin'.
The Girl-on-girl: These photos feature you and your girlfriends showing your sisterly love for each other by making out, grinding, or somehow fondling each other. The most innocent "girl-on-girl" will feature a simple kiss on the cheek, but this pose can quickly digress into the downright obvious, including boob grabbing, grinding, simulating other sexual positions and the like. Make sure that your girlfriends look hot so that these photos maximize their effect (if you're friends are ugly, just get new friends!).
NOTE: All of these photos must look as though they were taken effortlessly, in one take, despite how many photos one goes through to achieve the perfect picture.
There you have it! Now lets get snapping away!

Blog contributor engaging in "The Growler," effectively communicating how feisty and carefree she is about life (thus increasing the probability of willingness to experiment with alternative positions in bed).

Blog contributor's failed attempt at the close-eyed "kissy face." While trying to emphasize her kissable lips, this blog contributor wound up looking like she just ate some bad sushi. This is a good example of how all of these faces can go terribly wrong without extensive mirror practice. Shoulda stuck to the Growler!